[A rock disturbs a still pond. He sits up just a bit straighter from where his head had lolled to the side just a little.]
That's the kind of answer I expected from you.
[Is, and yet it isn't. But that's like Akechi, too. It's exactly let him to not only meet each and every one of Akira's expectations, but to surpass them by all means available to him.]
I'm not sure that's a question I can answer for you, though. [He lets his head roll back against his neck, stares back up at the ceiling. It's a casual, loose movement, considering the heavy weight he's about to tackle handling.] You don't know this yet, but by definition I've already done both. I've defied fate to give people their own freedom of choice.
[He can feel Yaldabaoth's chains around Akechi's neck as if they're his own.]
Maybe it won't change anything. But when you're free of this world... [When I've saved you. When I defy that fate again.] ...When you're back home, you should ask more about the Metaverse. Dig deeper than you ever have before.
[He shuts his eyes and wishes he could see butterfly wings.
When you see me again, you should ask me what I know. Maybe together, we can cast off the chains together.]
If there's anyone that can find it, I know it's you.
[ A freedom won that led Akira right into the den of another battle, pulled taut by a defied fate that must see him as a joke.
The Metaverse has unlimited potential and limitless power. He's seen what researchers can only huddle and whisper about. There are things he's never told them, more said in vague, uncertain terms. That world is his. Was his. Akira and the thieves took it, but they're no owners. Not even Shido can claim that, no matter how many times he's assumed Akechi's power as his own in dark, empty rooms.
Akira says to seek it. Akechi will. Dig deeper. He will. Shido's demise is some time away, Akechi's own potential death at the hands of a cabal imminent after, but not guaranteed.
In the swirling water by Akira's drenched waist -
he sees red, throbbing walls of an unknown world. The stone seating, headstones. Drips of water hold whispers he can never parse.
Just how far down does Mementos go. It's not as if he hasn't wondered. Thought further about it when he was shoved into a goddamn cat and they covered more ground than ever. Collecting flowers, stamps, a boy in a car-
Akechi huffs out a laugh that sounds more exasperated than it is. He's intrigued. A mystery from his rival-
Let's make adeal, okay?
YouHewon't can't sayno, will can you he? ]
You always leave me with more questions than answers. I can't say I dislike that about you. Fine then - I accept your challenge, and possible death wish. Whatever I find out may ruin your chances of success, slim as that margin already was.
[ He will look because there are more researchers in the world than who Shido's caught under his thrall.
No, there's one with a noose tangled around his throat that's impossibly immune to that type of power. There's another kind that calls to him. Akechi can give it. Wield him like a weapon. Get information, decipher it-
It's the antithesis to how he's operated regarding that man this whole time and now-
It's apparent, more than ever, what was meant by the coexistence of those two terms.
He pulls his eyes away from the water, a man's waist and stretches his arms high above his head. Drops them back into the water a moment later. ]
Be careful with who you tell to 'dig deeper' - that man will run in there headfirst and get himself killed if he overhears such talk. It's difficult enough as is to manage his incessant curiosity about that place.
[When he speaks, they're his quietest words of all.]
I know that already. I'm saying it to you and not him for a reason.
[With the right tone, it could sound like a rebuke, but it's anything but. It's far too soft to be anything but melancholic.]
He's strong, but he doesn't know what it's really like in there. [And neither do you.] I'm telling you because I've seen it. I know that you'll be able to face it.
[It might not be true.
Even as incomparably strong as Akechi Goro is, it still might not be true. It might only be a different type of ending for him.
He doesn't want him to go in there alone. It's why, in spite of everything he's saying, he must bank on that other Kurusu Akira and Maruki Takuto to stand at his back.]
Regardless, I'm not worried about you ruining my chances. [He glances back down at him, and the look in his eyes is a paradox - one part the sharpness of Joker, one part the selective tenderness of Akira.] I'm counting on it.
[If anyone could stop the blind rush of the Phantom Thieves into their own noose, it has to be him.]
You can become the bullet that will shoot straight through the twisted fate they tried to imprison us in. I believe that with my whole heart. [Because Akira's skill isn't to save someone - it has always been to give them the means to save themselves.] You, more than anyone I know, hate to be controlled. That's why I know I can believe in you. [Soft and intense, twined together and inseparable.] I know I can believe in your justice, that will never allow it.
[It's a gamble, perhaps, even with all of his belief.
But Akira is well used to playing with the highest stakes.]
[ It's the why that makes up Kurusu Akira that has intrigued him from the second they shook hands under a blistering hot light. It felt new. It felt free, even if Akechi couldn't see what hid behind his mask. Even if he sought, looked, spoke in a silver tongue meant to impress to gauge-
It didn't work. He wanted more.
And he sees through it now because Kurusu Akira wants him to - there's a thread, a string, and words meant to bind and tie. A bullet that shoots through fate - he can't help to scoff at the metaphorical discussion. The same gun that shot through his skull will shoot through his friends in whatever twisted distortion hides in the Metaverse. He destroys. That's a given. It won't matter who becomes collateral damage. ]
You still believe in that fake shit I said? Justice? You think I really care about that at all? A bullet that shoots through fate-
[ What goddamn justice -
Still drives him to fulfill a mother's wish.
One he doesn't give a shit about. One he will never, ever let go. ]
Isn't that a path that belongs to you?
[ But that twisting, churning sensation in his gut keeps the statement from lacking any bite. No, they both are meant to challenge fate. Kurusu Akira holds faith Akechi Goro will come through.
Joker knows Crow might. Joker knows Crow won't.
And in that second, he can't stand him. In that moment, he leans forward. Tips his chin and head up to be above him. To feign an aura of smug superiority. As if Akira is a fool for even speaking. Keeps his gaze level on the eyes of a man who wields honesty like a weapon. Akechi can sharpen his tongue too. ]
My justice will kill you. Your justice will set you up for failure. There's no path that ends well for you in a world where I know all this. Yet you still say it to me?
[ It's so funny - he wants to puke. Wants to feel Akira's throat pulse in his fingers. wants to live up to an expectation from the only person he considers an equal. Wants to fail and see that faith crumble until Akira is nothing more than another puddle of rot in a forgotten world.
A tone light, and sharp. ]
You're always full of surprises. It doesn't make me unhappy - your faith in your so called bonds will never cease to amaze.
[ It's so incredibly stupid. ]
But that's why you're so special, isn't it? It's what makes you Joker.
[Because Akechi is a wildcard, too, just like him. Even if Akira will never place that expectation on him to uphold those same types of bonds.]
Your justice will kill me. My justice will set me up for failure. Those are the outcomes you believe to be true. [It's a very careful, very deliberate repetition of the words.] But there were a lot more variables in our game than either of us ever could've anticipated.
[Puppet strings and chains - what difference was even between them, when the outcome of it all was the same?]
Maybe we both had some things wrong. [It's a soft delivery again, because-] Not in what we believed. I wouldn't insult both of us by even suggesting that. But the ways we went about it... It's impossible not to misstep when something is already setting you up to fail. [Akira's voice has been so soft, which is why it's stark the moment that it turns sharp.] Someone has been playing both of us for fools for a very, very long time.
[Akechi too young, Akira too alone. There was no way for either of them to escape the loops tightening further and further upon their necks.]
I won't abide by that. I didn't. And I don't think you will, either.
[Because he already knows Akechi won't.
He couldn't even stand it when Akira pulled one over on him.]
[ A tone so quiet, Akechi has to strain to hear it over the dripping water. A voice so resolute that it binds that blazing red thread - it wraps, and wraps, and wraps around his mind and heart.
'Someone has been playing both of us for fools for a very, very long time.
Someone, not Shido. Impossible for it to be Shido. Akechi is playing Shido and Akira is a puppet to both of them under it.
Someone, not Shido, and there's a surge in his chest that goes beyond normal wrath and rage. It burns in his heart - feels like Robin Hood's piercing arrow.
Someone.
Someone.
Someone.
And that is the most intolerable realization of all. Akechi didn't account for someone. Akira was unexpected, but never someone. The way he warped and twisted his whole existence to benefit a man he would kill doesn't involve someone.
And it's that intrusion into a life where so little belongs to him that ignites and scorches.
This Akira knows who someone is. Akechi refuses to inquire further. It's not a lie - the way he speaks proves it. That ever honest resolve a striking blow that does more damage than any attack during their one on one battle.
He doesn't blink - waits, watches, listens. Listens - more than ever, he's listening to Kurusu Akira alone. ]
I have no clue who you could be referring to. [ Pointed and bitter - it's not aimed at Akira, though he speaks like it might be. ] But I won't accept a world where I'm played for a fool.
[ They will pay for it. ]
Be prepared then - you or whatever version of you exists in my world. I won't stop until I find that truth.
[ He has time - not much, but enough. He can find someone. ]
I won't understand at first. [He hasn't flinched the entire time that Akechi has loomed over him, and he doesn't start now. Still just as unmoving, just as placid - save for every time he exposes the edge of a blade in his own voice.] I won't have the knowledge to. But if he's anything like me... If he got to experience even more with you, there's no way he won't believe in you, too.
[To you, he thinks at someone who isn't the person before him, one year older, I will pass on everything. To you, I will leave all of the responsibility you never asked for.
To you, I will entrust Akechi Goro.
He just has to get him through this world first, as safely as he can.]
If you have that sort of conviction, though, I know you'll find it. You'll figure out what we couldn't. [It feels like such an insurmountable thing, especially if he ends up losing all of his memories of this world... But Akira has faith in his ability to surpass that, too.] Use me if it helps you. Ignore me if it doesn't.
[Unchained, unfettered - Akechi may very well kill him for real this time. Akira won't be quite as strong as he was when they faced off in the engine room, and that was already a close fight.
It's yet another thing that he must pass off. It's alright if he dies, because Akira trusts in himself to protect the rest of the Phantom Thieves before he does. It's an outcome that's acceptable to him, so long as Akechi and Maruki live.]
Whatever you have to do, do it. If anything I say can put a stop to it, I won't accept a world where you're tricked like that. [He hasn't moved - until now, when his fingers brush Akechi's wrist.] I want an even game between us. The way it was here, where we can be our weakest and our strongest when across from each other. You've gone through too much to deserve anything less than that.
[So to you, Akechi Goro-
-become the arrow that will strike Yaldabaoth's heart, and I will be your bow.]
[ Presumptuous as ever to think Akechi would even pull Akira into his plan for mutual benefit.
But he talks. Keeps talking. It doesn't matter how much time separates them, doesn't matter if every thought in Akechi's brain is subdued by near heatstroke inducing water or his own erratic, volatile mind twisting every word heard.
It doesn't matter because there's always a part of him attuned to whatever comes out of Akira's mouth. Whether he agrees, disagrees, wants to fight it or rip it out of his throat before it ever leaves his lips - he's listening.
And he listens now.
Use me and he's in a dark office. Use him and make it look like a suicide. Akechi didn't need a push to do it - all too happy to do it. Remembers spending hours and hours and hours and hours plotting how to do it. Sat on his bed, on a train, zoned on a street corner imagining Akira's twisted expression when a betrayal was exposed. Use me is vicious. Cruel. It's a Kurusu only he knows. It's a Kurusu that made him think he would join Akechi in Shido's hold.
Ignore me and he doesn't care. He doesn't care. He tried because he never cared. Wanted to get closer and closer and closer than ever the less he cared. Ignore me as if there's a reality in which Akechi won't manipulate him to get what he wants.
'Whatever you have to do-
do it.'
The implication is grotesque. It's the Akira that would thrive if he could get away from those that flock to him for salvation. Set up to be a martyr, meant to be more.
A knot forms in the pit of his stomach, against his wrist. An imaginary string binds with only the brush of a hand.
There's power in everything Akira does and it's-
Enthralling. Exciting. Maddening. Irritating. His eyes feel dry despite the humidity. He can't think. Can't ever think.
But he can move, so he does. The arm untouched by Akira raising out of the water.]
Tempting me to do your dirty work for you. How cruel.
[ But he doesn't sound mad. Amused, more than anything. Entertained, more than anything. Interested above all. ]
But I've always enjoyed our little games. It doesn't change my answer - I'll take the challenge still.
[ And when he gets back, he will leave hints, clues, drop knowledge to level the playing field and see what that Joker does with it. ]
You're not someone I can lose against, after all.
[ And that raised hand moves to Akira's neck - hovers, and slides up to his chin to grasp. To keep his head straight. To force his eyes on Akechi and Akechi alone. A mockery of the featherlight touch he was given, an attack in return. ]
My justice will always end with a corpse. It's up to you how many end up as a collateral. Maybe that's what you want. Who am I to deny such a wish?
[ Akira's skin is warm - far warmer than the water. The haze adds an odd look to his eye - ignites a fire behind those unnaturally gray eyes. ]
You've gone through too much to deserve anything less than that, Joker.
[Still. Calm. He remains so as Akechi grips his jaw and throws down a gauntlet, and continues to even as his other hand reaches up-
-to do nothing more than touch him, same as the other one. A loose hold that can barely be called one, easy to break out of.]
You're right.
[Your justice will always end with a body.
And I'm going to make sure it isn't yours.]
You have no hesitance with them, but your kills have specific reasons. I've already accounted for that. [And finally, there's movement across his face - the smirk of Joker, who has already placed all of his bets atop a casino's light fixtures.] There's no chip I've placed down that I don't have full faith in or that I'm not ready to lose.
[Akira may fall, but the Phantom Thieves will not.
Maruki will not fall.
Akechi will not fall.]
I want to see what happens when the game is finally balanced. [His voice is a hush in the heat of the bathhouse.] So show me everything you can do, Crow. I know you won't let me down.
[ A board fills between them - every word a new piece on it. Akechi can feel the pawns form chains around his wrists, forever trapping him in this liminal space with only them. Only him. Akira's eyes on him while their game sets, resets, breaks.
As if no one else matters. Akira speaks like only he matters. Wanted. Needed. He hears it all in the challenge placed on a game no longer skewed towards one and one alone.
It's a pounding, pulsing, wild thrash against his ribs that shakes him to speak again. He's furious - and that excites him. Irritated - and he feels something akin to joy alongside it. Wants nothing more than to shut Akira up because he doesn't need this golden boy's praise, help, accolades-
But he wants it.
More than anything.
The attention of his one and only rival a constant need he could never shake in a reality that lacked him.
Akechi only realizes how close they are when he goes to speak again - Akira's breath hits his face. He thinks it would only take a second to close the gap. He doesn't. Talks low and quiet - a conversation for only them continuing. He can't stand to see a king made with Akira's words alone. ]
Then I want you to see it.
[ Him. This one. Akechi doesn't give a shit how it works. It's his Akira. It's not. It'll be a hollow victory to leave him to a world where Akechi Goro died. That pathetic carbon copy that failed - completely failed. Couldn't even kill one boy, one man, one world-
Disgusts him more than anything. ]
Every moment I one up you, every time I crush your little friends, every secret I unravel right under your nose - you'll witness it.
[ He wants Akira in every reality to be aware he lost. ]
Not the challenge. Not the certainty of triumph. Not even the threat to the people that Akira loves the most.
Then I want you to see it.
It's because Akechi sees him, and not the one he should've been.]
You could always see me, couldn't you? [It's a quiet hush that hangs between them, in a distance that's hardly there. It's a distance that they've closed before, but Akira doesn't move to do it now. Not even with the emotion coloring his voice that wobbles between joy and sorrow.] Better than anyone else.
[What must it have felt like, in the reality where their hands reached towards each other just a little more?
What did it make that Akira feel? What did it make him do?]
If that's your challenge... then I'll rise to meet it.
[Truth and lie, linked together in a chain of Akira's own making.
He must make sure Akechi lives. He must make sure Maruki lives. To ensure that, he must pass the baton to the other Kurusu Akira, whatever the cost may be to his own body. He cannot let anything endanger this plan, no matter what it means he must do.
But to do that-
would surely mean they'll go to a place he can never follow.
And yet...]
Even if it looks impossible, I'll find a way. I won't turn my back on a challenge you've put down.
[Because he will never stop mourning Akechi Goro.
He will never refuse to fight Akechi Goro.
He will never again abandon Akechi Goro.
He will never stop his heart from-]
Just as you've seen me, I will see you. [As soft as cotton, as sharp as a blade.] It's a deal.
[ The bathhouse is equal ground. It's not so different from a layer of Mementos formed for the two of them alone. For once, the labyrinth structure hadn't bothered Akechi. No one else would ever find themselves on the exact same floor where a test of strength had turned into a near bloodbath. ]
In every reality, Akira, I will always see you. There is no escape from that.
[ A fool would hear affection where it isn't. It's soft, mocking, and assured. As if there was no other outcome. As if it were impossible for any other scenario to occur. As if the breathless acceptance is its own awakening in a world adjacent to the Metaverse. ]
But you wouldn't want to be free of that, would you?
[ Because he's here with a gaping wound in the center of his forehead, marred with flecks of blood only Akechi can see. Because he's here despite a vicious assault that always seems like it's one snapped thread away from happening again. Because he's here, chin in Akechi's palm, mind in Akechi's palm, voice and an untamed, wild heart speaking against his palm and-
It is Kurusu Akira, it's Joker, it's a boy with world's weight willingly put on his shoulders. His own life crushed for it. A vigilante. A hero. Akechi wonders if his fingers can pull more from him - vile words, hatred against the unjust world that ruined him. ]
I look forward to this new game between the two of us. I know you won't let me down.
[ But he doesn't. There's a thrill in watching someone crumble over time. A shame he's yet to see a single crack in those eyes.
And he waits anyway. Wants to see them shatter anyway. Thinks he can smell the rot from a cell two realities away.
Akechi doesn't lean in to close the distance - lets that featherlight touch remain as it is. It's enough to feel puffs of air against his lips. Each one a promise grander than the last. ]
Back in my world, I challenged you to a dual long before you caught onto my scheme.
[ The grip on his chin wanes and his fingers slide under the bottom of his jaw, to the front of his throat, over his Adam's apple and- ]
I lost, though I hadn't done more than wield a lie against you. I despised you then.
[ Akechi doesn't squeeze, but he wants to. Thumbs over the lump in Akira's throat before it drops to collarbone. His splayed hand could still ruin him. He wants to ruin. His fingers curl against the lowest part of his neck like he won't stop himself from ruining him. As if he's only a second away from giving in. A loose shackle around his wrist could rip him back from tearing into Akira - maybe he's counting on it. ]
[Affectionless words, which Akira can meet with nothing but a twisted affection.
Hatred, which Akira can never return, even with every complex and negative thing that tosses about in his heart for the boy turned into a man before him.
It's been nearly a year and a half since Akira never watched Akechi Goro die, and his heart mourned for him with every day that passed. Even here in this reality, living under the same roof with him, he has still continued to mourn him. Has made the entire purpose of his existence here to save him.
Akira mourns the breathing ghost across from him, and he didn't even live in the reality where Kurusu Akira reached for his hand.
So... what did that Akira feel?
What did that Akira do?]
I know.
[He does.
And it will never change a thing.
He's certain, now more than ever, that he knows exactly how his other self must've felt.
To you, whose heart has broken more than mine ever could-
you'll meet me on the other side, won't you?
It won't be the first impossible deal he's made good on.]
And in every world, I will crave to be seen by you.
[Enough, too much, never enough. His thumb slips against his pulse point and doesn't press.
Too much emotion clouding his logic. Too sentimental. It will always be Akira's downfall, just as much as it's his strength.]
I'll put on a good show for you. Make sure you don't look away, Detective.
[ Nothing will ever be enough. Akechi wants more than the world can give, in ways that cruel, vile and meant to satisfy only him.
I will crave to be seen by you and he wants to rip Akira's throat apart until nothing else can come out. Until that's all that lingers between them. Until those become the last words they share in this world, held tight in Akechi's blood soaked palm.
He wants to crush them, shatter them, rip them to pieces. It's not like he needs Akira - he doesn't. Doesn't want his full attention and-
He can't shake the warmth in his chest - burning, rising, consuming his heart and both persona with it.
Akechi's fingers cradle and rest on Akira's throat. Nothing pulls him back, he isn't ripped away, not torn off.
It annoys him. Invigorates. It's hard to breathe, suddenly, in this humid space with only them.
He could kill him. He wants to kill him. Feels like he's wrapped around the little finger of a powerful leader who should be leashed in his own hand and that's the only way to shatter it.
Considers it, once more, as he scrapes his fingertips along the side of Akira's neck - light, thin lines forming under it.
It's hot. He can't stand Kurusu Akira. Finds himself following an order to make sure he doesn't look away because all he can see is dark eyes, ruddy skin.
There is no reality where Akechi Goro doesn't seek Kurusu Akira. There is no world where he averts his eyes.
And even as he loosens his fingers and hand until it hangs limp in Akira's grip, tilts his head back now that a point's made - he doesn't look away. ]
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no subject
That's the kind of answer I expected from you.
[Is, and yet it isn't. But that's like Akechi, too. It's exactly let him to not only meet each and every one of Akira's expectations, but to surpass them by all means available to him.]
I'm not sure that's a question I can answer for you, though. [He lets his head roll back against his neck, stares back up at the ceiling. It's a casual, loose movement, considering the heavy weight he's about to tackle handling.] You don't know this yet, but by definition I've already done both. I've defied fate to give people their own freedom of choice.
[He can feel Yaldabaoth's chains around Akechi's neck as if they're his own.]
Maybe it won't change anything. But when you're free of this world... [When I've saved you. When I defy that fate again.] ...When you're back home, you should ask more about the Metaverse. Dig deeper than you ever have before.
[He shuts his eyes and wishes he could see butterfly wings.
When you see me again, you should ask me what I know. Maybe together, we can cast off the chains together.]
If there's anyone that can find it, I know it's you.
no subject
The Metaverse has unlimited potential and limitless power. He's seen what researchers can only huddle and whisper about. There are things he's never told them, more said in vague, uncertain terms. That world is his. Was his. Akira and the thieves took it, but they're no owners. Not even Shido can claim that, no matter how many times he's assumed Akechi's power as his own in dark, empty rooms.
Akira says to seek it. Akechi will. Dig deeper. He will. Shido's demise is some time away, Akechi's own potential death at the hands of a cabal imminent after, but not guaranteed.
In the swirling water by Akira's drenched waist -
he sees red, throbbing walls of an unknown world. The stone seating, headstones. Drips of water hold whispers he can never parse.
Just how far down does Mementos go. It's not as if he hasn't wondered. Thought further about it when he was shoved into a goddamn cat and they covered more ground than ever. Collecting flowers, stamps, a boy in a car-Akechi huffs out a laugh that sounds more exasperated than it is. He's intrigued. A mystery from his rival-
Let's make adeal, okay?
You always leave me with more questions than answers. I can't say I dislike that about you. Fine then - I accept your challenge, and possible death wish. Whatever I find out may ruin your chances of success, slim as that margin already was.
[ He will look because there are more researchers in the world than who Shido's caught under his thrall.
No, there's one with a noose tangled around his throat that's impossibly immune to that type of power. There's another kind that calls to him. Akechi can give it. Wield him like a weapon. Get information, decipher it-
It's the antithesis to how he's operated regarding that man this whole time and now-
It's apparent, more than ever, what was meant by the coexistence of those two terms.
He pulls his eyes away from the water, a man's waist and stretches his arms high above his head. Drops them back into the water a moment later. ]
Be careful with who you tell to 'dig deeper' - that man will run in there headfirst and get himself killed if he overhears such talk. It's difficult enough as is to manage his incessant curiosity about that place.
no subject
I know that already. I'm saying it to you and not him for a reason.
[With the right tone, it could sound like a rebuke, but it's anything but. It's far too soft to be anything but melancholic.]
He's strong, but he doesn't know what it's really like in there. [And neither do you.] I'm telling you because I've seen it. I know that you'll be able to face it.
[It might not be true.
Even as incomparably strong as Akechi Goro is, it still might not be true. It might only be a different type of ending for him.
He doesn't want him to go in there alone. It's why, in spite of everything he's saying, he must bank on that other Kurusu Akira and Maruki Takuto to stand at his back.]
Regardless, I'm not worried about you ruining my chances. [He glances back down at him, and the look in his eyes is a paradox - one part the sharpness of Joker, one part the selective tenderness of Akira.] I'm counting on it.
[If anyone could stop the blind rush of the Phantom Thieves into their own noose, it has to be him.]
You can become the bullet that will shoot straight through the twisted fate they tried to imprison us in. I believe that with my whole heart. [Because Akira's skill isn't to save someone - it has always been to give them the means to save themselves.] You, more than anyone I know, hate to be controlled. That's why I know I can believe in you. [Soft and intense, twined together and inseparable.] I know I can believe in your justice, that will never allow it.
[It's a gamble, perhaps, even with all of his belief.
But Akira is well used to playing with the highest stakes.]
no subject
It didn't work. He wanted more.
And he sees through it now because Kurusu Akira wants him to - there's a thread, a string, and words meant to bind and tie. A bullet that shoots through fate - he can't help to scoff at the metaphorical discussion. The same gun that shot through his skull will shoot through his friends in whatever twisted distortion hides in the Metaverse. He destroys. That's a given. It won't matter who becomes collateral damage. ]
You still believe in that fake shit I said? Justice? You think I really care about that at all? A bullet that shoots through fate-
[ What goddamn justice -
Still drives him to fulfill a mother's wish.
One he doesn't give a shit about. One he will never, ever let go. ]Isn't that a path that belongs to you?
[ But that twisting, churning sensation in his gut keeps the statement from lacking any bite. No, they both are meant to challenge fate. Kurusu Akira holds faith Akechi Goro will come through.
Joker knows Crow might. Joker knows Crow won't.
And in that second, he can't stand him. In that moment, he leans forward. Tips his chin and head up to be above him. To feign an aura of smug superiority. As if Akira is a fool for even speaking. Keeps his gaze level on the eyes of a man who wields honesty like a weapon. Akechi can sharpen his tongue too. ]
My justice will kill you. Your justice will set you up for failure. There's no path that ends well for you in a world where I know all this. Yet you still say it to me?
[ It's so funny - he wants to puke. Wants to feel Akira's throat pulse in his fingers. wants to live up to an expectation from the only person he considers an equal. Wants to fail and see that faith crumble until Akira is nothing more than another puddle of rot in a forgotten world.
A tone light, and sharp. ]
You're always full of surprises. It doesn't make me unhappy - your faith in your so called bonds will never cease to amaze.
[ It's so incredibly stupid. ]
But that's why you're so special, isn't it? It's what makes you Joker.
no subject
[Because Akechi is a wildcard, too, just like him. Even if Akira will never place that expectation on him to uphold those same types of bonds.]
Your justice will kill me. My justice will set me up for failure. Those are the outcomes you believe to be true. [It's a very careful, very deliberate repetition of the words.] But there were a lot more variables in our game than either of us ever could've anticipated.
[Puppet strings and chains - what difference was even between them, when the outcome of it all was the same?]
Maybe we both had some things wrong. [It's a soft delivery again, because-] Not in what we believed. I wouldn't insult both of us by even suggesting that. But the ways we went about it... It's impossible not to misstep when something is already setting you up to fail. [Akira's voice has been so soft, which is why it's stark the moment that it turns sharp.] Someone has been playing both of us for fools for a very, very long time.
[Akechi too young, Akira too alone. There was no way for either of them to escape the loops tightening further and further upon their necks.]
I won't abide by that. I didn't. And I don't think you will, either.
[Because he already knows Akechi won't.
He couldn't even stand it when Akira pulled one over on him.]
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Someone, not Shido. Impossible for it to be Shido. Akechi is playing Shido and Akira is a puppet to both of them under it.
Someone, not Shido, and there's a surge in his chest that goes beyond normal wrath and rage. It burns in his heart - feels like Robin Hood's piercing arrow.
Someone.
Someone.
And that is the most intolerable realization of all. Akechi didn't account for someone. Akira was unexpected, but never someone. The way he warped and twisted his whole existence to benefit a man he would kill doesn't involve someone.And it's that intrusion into a life where so little belongs to him that ignites and scorches.
This Akira knows who someone is. Akechi refuses to inquire further. It's not a lie - the way he speaks proves it. That ever honest resolve a striking blow that does more damage than any attack during their one on one battle.
He doesn't blink - waits, watches, listens. Listens - more than ever, he's listening to Kurusu Akira alone. ]
I have no clue who you could be referring to. [ Pointed and bitter - it's not aimed at Akira, though he speaks like it might be. ] But I won't accept a world where I'm played for a fool.
[ They will pay for it. ]
Be prepared then - you or whatever version of you exists in my world. I won't stop until I find that truth.
[ He has time - not much, but enough. He can find someone. ]
no subject
[To you, he thinks at someone who isn't the person before him, one year older, I will pass on everything. To you, I will leave all of the responsibility you never asked for.
To you, I will entrust Akechi Goro.
He just has to get him through this world first, as safely as he can.]
If you have that sort of conviction, though, I know you'll find it. You'll figure out what we couldn't. [It feels like such an insurmountable thing, especially if he ends up losing all of his memories of this world... But Akira has faith in his ability to surpass that, too.] Use me if it helps you. Ignore me if it doesn't.
[Unchained, unfettered - Akechi may very well kill him for real this time. Akira won't be quite as strong as he was when they faced off in the engine room, and that was already a close fight.
It's yet another thing that he must pass off. It's alright if he dies, because Akira trusts in himself to protect the rest of the Phantom Thieves before he does. It's an outcome that's acceptable to him, so long as Akechi and Maruki live.]
Whatever you have to do, do it. If anything I say can put a stop to it, I won't accept a world where you're tricked like that. [He hasn't moved - until now, when his fingers brush Akechi's wrist.] I want an even game between us. The way it was here, where we can be our weakest and our strongest when across from each other. You've gone through too much to deserve anything less than that.
[So to you, Akechi Goro-
Find the truth, and decide your justice.
cw: murder, suicide, violent thoughts
But he talks. Keeps talking. It doesn't matter how much time separates them, doesn't matter if every thought in Akechi's brain is subdued by near heatstroke inducing water or his own erratic, volatile mind twisting every word heard.
It doesn't matter because there's always a part of him attuned to whatever comes out of Akira's mouth. Whether he agrees, disagrees, wants to fight it or rip it out of his throat before it ever leaves his lips - he's listening.
And he listens now.
Use me and he's in a dark office. Use him and make it look like a suicide. Akechi didn't need a push to do it - all too happy to do it. Remembers spending hours and hours and hours and hours plotting how to do it. Sat on his bed, on a train, zoned on a street corner imagining Akira's twisted expression when a betrayal was exposed. Use me is vicious. Cruel. It's a Kurusu only he knows. It's a Kurusu that made him think he would join Akechi in Shido's hold.
Ignore me and he doesn't care. He doesn't care. He tried because he never cared. Wanted to get closer and closer and closer than ever the less he cared. Ignore me as if there's a reality in which Akechi won't manipulate him to get what he wants.
'Whatever you have to do-
do it.'
The implication is grotesque. It's the Akira that would thrive if he could get away from those that flock to him for salvation. Set up to be a martyr, meant to be more.A knot forms in the pit of his stomach, against his wrist. An imaginary string binds with only the brush of a hand.
There's power in everything Akira does and it's-
Enthralling. Exciting. Maddening. Irritating. His eyes feel dry despite the humidity. He can't think. Can't ever think.
But he can move, so he does. The arm untouched by Akira raising out of the water.]
Tempting me to do your dirty work for you. How cruel.
[ But he doesn't sound mad. Amused, more than anything. Entertained, more than anything. Interested above all. ]
But I've always enjoyed our little games. It doesn't change my answer - I'll take the challenge still.
[ And when he gets back, he will leave hints, clues, drop knowledge to level the playing field and see what that Joker does with it. ]
You're not someone I can lose against, after all.
[ And that raised hand moves to Akira's neck - hovers, and slides up to his chin to grasp. To keep his head straight. To force his eyes on Akechi and Akechi alone. A mockery of the featherlight touch he was given, an attack in return. ]
My justice will always end with a corpse. It's up to you how many end up as a collateral. Maybe that's what you want. Who am I to deny such a wish?
[ Akira's skin is warm - far warmer than the water. The haze adds an odd look to his eye - ignites a fire behind those unnaturally gray eyes. ]
You've gone through too much to deserve anything less than that, Joker.
typical akechi
-to do nothing more than touch him, same as the other one. A loose hold that can barely be called one, easy to break out of.]
You're right.
[Your justice will always end with a body.
And I'm going to make sure it isn't yours.]
You have no hesitance with them, but your kills have specific reasons. I've already accounted for that. [And finally, there's movement across his face - the smirk of Joker, who has already placed all of his bets atop a casino's light fixtures.] There's no chip I've placed down that I don't have full faith in or that I'm not ready to lose.
[Akira may fall, but the Phantom Thieves will not.
Maruki will not fall.
Akechi will not fall.]
I want to see what happens when the game is finally balanced. [His voice is a hush in the heat of the bathhouse.] So show me everything you can do, Crow. I know you won't let me down.
no subject
As if no one else matters. Akira speaks like only he matters. Wanted. Needed. He hears it all in the challenge placed on a game no longer skewed towards one and one alone.
It's a pounding, pulsing, wild thrash against his ribs that shakes him to speak again. He's furious - and that excites him. Irritated - and he feels something akin to joy alongside it. Wants nothing more than to shut Akira up because he doesn't need this golden boy's praise, help, accolades-
But he wants it.
More than anything.
The attention of his one and only rival a constant need he could never shake in a reality that lacked him.Akechi only realizes how close they are when he goes to speak again - Akira's breath hits his face. He thinks it would only take a second to close the gap. He doesn't. Talks low and quiet - a conversation for only them continuing. He can't stand to see a king made with Akira's words alone. ]
Then I want you to see it.
[ Him. This one. Akechi doesn't give a shit how it works. It's his Akira. It's not. It'll be a hollow victory to leave him to a world where Akechi Goro died. That pathetic carbon copy that failed - completely failed. Couldn't even kill one boy, one man, one world-
Disgusts him more than anything. ]
Every moment I one up you, every time I crush your little friends, every secret I unravel right under your nose - you'll witness it.
[ He wants Akira in every reality to be aware he lost. ]
You won't say no, will you?
no subject
Not the challenge. Not the certainty of triumph. Not even the threat to the people that Akira loves the most.
Then I want you to see it.
It's because Akechi sees him, and not the one he should've been.]
You could always see me, couldn't you? [It's a quiet hush that hangs between them, in a distance that's hardly there. It's a distance that they've closed before, but Akira doesn't move to do it now. Not even with the emotion coloring his voice that wobbles between joy and sorrow.] Better than anyone else.
[What must it have felt like, in the reality where their hands reached towards each other just a little more?
What did it make that Akira feel? What did it make him do?]
If that's your challenge... then I'll rise to meet it.
[Truth and lie, linked together in a chain of Akira's own making.
He must make sure Akechi lives. He must make sure Maruki lives. To ensure that, he must pass the baton to the other Kurusu Akira, whatever the cost may be to his own body. He cannot let anything endanger this plan, no matter what it means he must do.
But to do that-
And yet...]
Even if it looks impossible, I'll find a way. I won't turn my back on a challenge you've put down.
[Because he will never stop mourning Akechi Goro.
He will never refuse to fight Akechi Goro.
He will never again abandon Akechi Goro.
Just as you've seen me, I will see you. [As soft as cotton, as sharp as a blade.] It's a deal.
no subject
In every reality, Akira, I will always see you. There is no escape from that.
[ A fool would hear affection where it isn't. It's soft, mocking, and assured. As if there was no other outcome. As if it were impossible for any other scenario to occur. As if the breathless acceptance is its own awakening in a world adjacent to the Metaverse. ]
But you wouldn't want to be free of that, would you?
[ Because he's here with a gaping wound in the center of his forehead, marred with flecks of blood only Akechi can see. Because he's here despite a vicious assault that always seems like it's one snapped thread away from happening again. Because he's here, chin in Akechi's palm, mind in Akechi's palm, voice and an untamed, wild heart speaking against his palm and-
It is Kurusu Akira, it's Joker, it's a boy with world's weight willingly put on his shoulders. His own life crushed for it. A vigilante. A hero. Akechi wonders if his fingers can pull more from him - vile words, hatred against the unjust world that ruined him. ]
I look forward to this new game between the two of us. I know you won't let me down.
[ But he doesn't. There's a thrill in watching someone crumble over time. A shame he's yet to see a single crack in those eyes.
And he waits anyway. Wants to see them shatter anyway. Thinks he can smell the rot from a cell two realities away.
Akechi doesn't lean in to close the distance - lets that featherlight touch remain as it is. It's enough to feel puffs of air against his lips. Each one a promise grander than the last. ]
Back in my world, I challenged you to a dual long before you caught onto my scheme.
[ The grip on his chin wanes and his fingers slide under the bottom of his jaw, to the front of his throat, over his Adam's apple and- ]
I lost, though I hadn't done more than wield a lie against you. I despised you then.
[ Akechi doesn't squeeze, but he wants to. Thumbs over the lump in Akira's throat before it drops to collarbone. His splayed hand could still ruin him. He wants to ruin. His fingers curl against the lowest part of his neck like he won't stop himself from ruining him. As if he's only a second away from giving in. A loose shackle around his wrist could rip him back from tearing into Akira - maybe he's counting on it. ]
I hate you, Kurusu Akira, in every world.
no subject
Hatred, which Akira can never return, even with every complex and negative thing that tosses about in his heart for the boy turned into a man before him.
It's been nearly a year and a half since Akira never watched Akechi Goro die, and his heart mourned for him with every day that passed. Even here in this reality, living under the same roof with him, he has still continued to mourn him. Has made the entire purpose of his existence here to save him.
Akira mourns the breathing ghost across from him, and he didn't even live in the reality where Kurusu Akira reached for his hand.
So... what did that Akira feel?
What did that Akira do?]
I know.
[He does.
And it will never change a thing.
He's certain, now more than ever, that he knows exactly how his other self must've felt.
To you, whose heart has broken more than mine ever could-
It won't be the first impossible deal he's made good on.]
And in every world, I will crave to be seen by you.
[Enough, too much, never enough. His thumb slips against his pulse point and doesn't press.
Too much emotion clouding his logic. Too sentimental. It will always be Akira's downfall, just as much as it's his strength.]
I'll put on a good show for you. Make sure you don't look away, Detective.
WRAPPED.....
I will crave to be seen by you and he wants to rip Akira's throat apart until nothing else can come out. Until that's all that lingers between them. Until those become the last words they share in this world, held tight in Akechi's blood soaked palm.
He wants to crush them, shatter them, rip them to pieces. It's not like he needs Akira - he doesn't. Doesn't want his full attention and-
He can't shake the warmth in his chest - burning, rising, consuming his heart and both persona with it.
Akechi's fingers cradle and rest on Akira's throat. Nothing pulls him back, he isn't ripped away, not torn off.
It annoys him. Invigorates. It's hard to breathe, suddenly, in this humid space with only them.
He could kill him. He wants to kill him. Feels like he's wrapped around the little finger of a powerful leader who should be leashed in his own hand and that's the only way to shatter it.
Considers it, once more, as he scrapes his fingertips along the side of Akira's neck - light, thin lines forming under it.
It's hot. He can't stand Kurusu Akira. Finds himself following an order to make sure he doesn't look away because all he can see is dark eyes, ruddy skin.
There is no reality where Akechi Goro doesn't seek Kurusu Akira. There is no world where he averts his eyes.
And even as he loosens his fingers and hand until it hangs limp in Akira's grip, tilts his head back now that a point's made - he doesn't look away. ]
You always do.