Having happiness and not being unhappy are also two different things.
[It may be a soft one, but it's still a counter.]
One of them seeks out joy... while the other lets things happen as they may.
[Maruki may guess at why if he thinks about it, but Akira's voice sounds just a little too knowing when he says it.
He turns his thoughts over in his head as if they're a worry stone. Even if it's not a perfect read, he's already picking up on the skittishness this conversation is bringing. He doesn't have long to make his point at all, if it isn't already too late.
Maybe this is truly a fruitless effort, when Akira knows he can't make any meaningful change until Maruki remembers what happened to him or has to live it if he hasn't yet. But Akira has never been able to leave well enough alone, especially not with him.
And more than that... he hates seeing someone he cares about in pain and being able to do nothing to stop it.]
You don't have to force yourself, if it's hard to think about this. [That isn't what Akira wants to say. He forces himself to say it anyway.] And I know your work isn't something that you can let go of right now, not truly. But...
[What's the point in the moments before a future that's already happened? What's the point in trying to ease something that Akira has already fixed, that he will fix again if need be?
Perhaps there's nothing that comes from this. Akechi would think it's pointless. The Phantom Thieves would worry about the toll it's taking on Akira's heart.
And yet-]
Here, you don't need to focus on your work right now. And when we get home... You can guess why you don't need to. [Akira closes his eyes. He doesn't cry easily. He won't do it now, even if he wishes he was alone so he could.] I'd like it if you could think about even one thing you'd like to do, on your own. Nothing to do with me, nothing to do with the actualization you wished for so desperately, nothing that you think others need or that you want to do for them... [He opens his eyes, smile full of pain.] You don't have to find an answer... but think about even one thing Maruki Takuto wants to do.
[And yet...
If Yoshizawa Sumire believed she was her sister for her almost her entire year of high school, Akira wouldn't regret even one time he smiled with her or she held his hand.
If Akechi Goro died at the beginning of winter, Akira wouldn't regret even one moment in January that he fought at his side or talked with a ghost about everything and nothing in a jazz club.
And if Maruki Takuto is here with him in another world... Akira would never, ever regret the chance to tell him everything he wished he'd had time to say.]
i can't read and i wish he couldn't read either 💔
[It may be a soft one, but it's still a counter.]
One of them seeks out joy... while the other lets things happen as they may.
[Maruki may guess at why if he thinks about it, but Akira's voice sounds just a little too knowing when he says it.
He turns his thoughts over in his head as if they're a worry stone. Even if it's not a perfect read, he's already picking up on the skittishness this conversation is bringing. He doesn't have long to make his point at all, if it isn't already too late.
Maybe this is truly a fruitless effort, when Akira knows he can't make any meaningful change until Maruki remembers what happened to him or has to live it if he hasn't yet. But Akira has never been able to leave well enough alone, especially not with him.
And more than that... he hates seeing someone he cares about in pain and being able to do nothing to stop it.]
You don't have to force yourself, if it's hard to think about this. [That isn't what Akira wants to say. He forces himself to say it anyway.] And I know your work isn't something that you can let go of right now, not truly. But...
[What's the point in the moments before a future that's already happened? What's the point in trying to ease something that Akira has already fixed, that he will fix again if need be?
Perhaps there's nothing that comes from this. Akechi would think it's pointless. The Phantom Thieves would worry about the toll it's taking on Akira's heart.
And yet-]
Here, you don't need to focus on your work right now. And when we get home... You can guess why you don't need to. [Akira closes his eyes. He doesn't cry easily. He won't do it now, even if he wishes he was alone so he could.] I'd like it if you could think about even one thing you'd like to do, on your own. Nothing to do with me, nothing to do with the actualization you wished for so desperately, nothing that you think others need or that you want to do for them... [He opens his eyes, smile full of pain.] You don't have to find an answer... but think about even one thing Maruki Takuto wants to do.
[And yet...
If Yoshizawa Sumire believed she was her sister for her almost her entire year of high school, Akira wouldn't regret even one time he smiled with her or she held his hand.
If Akechi Goro died at the beginning of winter, Akira wouldn't regret even one moment in January that he fought at his side or talked with a ghost about everything and nothing in a jazz club.
And if Maruki Takuto is here with him in another world... Akira would never, ever regret the chance to tell him everything he wished he'd had time to say.]